Axolotl Translations

Zuo Zhou’s face was filled with concern, but he nodded obediently. “Okay, just wait a moment.”

The warm water was quickly brought over. Shangguan Yu took the cup, tilted his head back, and drank several large gulps before gradually calming down.

“Xiao Yu,” Zuo Zhou watched Shangguan Yu closely, cautiously asking, “Would you like more?”

Shangguan Yu shook his head and handed the cup back to Zuo Zhou.

As Zuo Zhou reached for the cup, his fingers accidentally brushed against Shangguan Yu’s cold ones. A brief thought crossed his mind. He shifted and placed the cup on the coffee table, and then, gathering his courage, gently took Shangguan Yu’s hand.

“Xiao Yu, your hand is so cold. Let me warm it for you.”

Shangguan Yu, still lost in the painful aftermath of his emotional trauma, didn’t immediately react. When he finally reacted, he noticed that Zuo Zhou was holding his hand gently. The warmth from Zuo Zhou’s body was seeping into him through their joined hands, offering a comforting, steady heat.

Since the incident, Shangguan Yu had developed a strong aversion to the cold. His body temperature was lower than most young men his age, especially his hands and feet, which rarely warmed up, even in summer.

So, despite his usual dislike for physical contact with others, he found himself lingering in the moment, drawn to the warmth that Zuo Zhou offered.

Zuo Zhou’s heart was uneasy, but when he saw that Shangguan Yu seemed lost in thought and didn’t immediately pull his hand away, he couldn’t help but feel a sense of quiet joy. He lowered his voice and gently asked, “Xiao Yu, did something unpleasant come to your mind just now?”

Shangguan Yu snapped out of his reverie, awkwardly withdrawing his hand. But he didn’t leave; instead, he sat there and, for once, spoke with a rare honesty. “Mm, sometimes it happens. I’ll be fine in a while.”

Although Shangguan Yu spoke as if it were no big deal, the truth was that ever since the accident, every time he recalled the details of the crash, the pain of treatment, and the person who had cruelly abandoned him during his darkest moments with cruel words, he would experience the kind of painful stress response that had overwhelmed him earlier.

It was because of this that he had never been able to face the past or accept the reality. Escape was the only way he knew to protect himself.

Seeing that Shangguan Yu didn’t seem willing to speak further, Zuo Zhou wisely refrained from asking more questions. In fact, just having held Shangguan Yu’s hand earlier felt like a small victory for him—almost as if they had held hands for real.

So, it was important to know when to stop, especially with someone like Shangguan Yu. Pushing too hard would only backfire.

“That’s good to hear,” Zuo Zhou said, standing up and flashing a bright smile, as if nothing had happened earlier. “There are some snacks I bought in the kitchen. I’ll go get them.”

In fact, Shangguan Yu didn’t have much of an appetite, but he didn’t say anything. Instead, he silently watched Zuo Zhou’s back as he walked away, his fingers subtly curling.

***

It was Friday afternoon, and Shangguan Yu was sitting in the living room watching TV when Zuo Zhou returned.

“Xiao Yu,” Zuo Zhou greeted cheerfully as soon as he walked through the door. “I’m back!”

“Mm.”

Shangguan Yu responded briefly, casually turning his head to look at Zuo Zhou.

He noticed that Zuo Zhou was holding two large bags in each hand, and had a somewhat worn-out backpack on his back. He couldn’t help but ask, “Why are you carrying so many things?”

“Oh, these two bags are the groceries we need for the weekend, plus some fruit.”

“I also brought my computer back. I have an assignment for a professional course to do this weekend.”

Shangguan Yu had only asked casually, not expecting such a detailed answer from Zuo Zhou. He was momentarily stunned but then nodded to show he understood.

“I’ll go put these things away.”

Zuo Zhou organized the groceries before heading to his room to unpack the rest of his things.

Since it was still early for dinner, Shangguan Yu assumed that once Zuo Zhou went to his room, he wouldn’t be out anytime soon. So, he stayed in the living room, continuing to watch the overly dramatic TV show.

However, less than ten minutes later, Zuo Zhou walked out, holding a very bulky and old laptop.

Because of Shangguan Yu’s previous request—to avoid being in the same room as him—Zuo Zhou had been careful to maintain an environment where Shangguan Yu was the only one in the house, rarely appearing in the living room unless it was mealtime.

So, it was unexpected for Shangguan Yu to see Zuo Zhou in the living room during this non-mealtime.

When Zuo Zhou noticed Shangguan Yu’s surprised gaze, he tightened his grip on the laptop and immediately stopped walking. He spoke respectfully, “Xiao Yu, this computer is a bit old and needs to be plugged into the power source to work. But the desk in my room only has a two-hole socket, so I can’t use it there.”

Afterward, Zuo Zhou lifted the three-prong plug for Shangguan Yu to see.

“Then where do you want to use the computer?”

Zuo Zhou pointed to the sofa beside Shangguan Yu’s wheelchair. “There’s a three-hole socket behind that. I can sit on the sofa.”

“Oh, go ahead then.”

Zuo Zhou took the computer to the sofa, plugged it in, and sat up straight, waiting for the old laptop to boot up.

Shangguan Yu’s wheelchair was next to the sofa, so it almost felt like they were sitting side by side.

This feeling made Shangguan Yu uncomfortable, so he picked up the remote, intending to turn off the TV and return to his room.

However, just as he was about to press the button, Zuo Zhou suddenly spoke up in a pitiful tone, “Xiao Yu, am I bothering you here?”

Shangguan Yu turned his head to glance at Zuo Zhou, and in his eyes, he saw an unmistakable look of sadness. Paired with his young and handsome face, it made it hard to refuse him.

“…No, I’m just not used to this,” Shangguan Yu said, trying to be polite. “You can stay here and study. Don’t worry about me.”

“Then I’ll just go back to my room,” Zuo Zhou said, closing the laptop on his lap. He looked at Shangguan Yu with a somewhat aggrieved expression, adding, “I don’t want to disturb you. You finally have some time to watch TV in the living room. I’ll do my homework after you go to sleep. I’m young; staying up a few nights won’t be a problem.”

“…You can stay here. It doesn’t matter if I watch TV or not,” Shangguan Yu relented.

“It’s fine,” Zuo Zhou said firmly, shaking his head. “I’ll go back to my room.”

With that, Zuo Zhou stood up, preparing to unplug the power cord.

“……………”

Shangguan Yu wasn’t sure if it was his imagination, but he almost felt as though Zuo Zhou’s back was filled with loneliness and a kind of sadness, and the one responsible for putting him in this situation was none other than himself.

“Forget it,” Shangguan Yu sighed softly, feeling a bit helpless. “Just sit down.”

Zuo Zhou froze for a moment, then turned to look at Shangguan Yu. His eyes, which had been clouded with disappointment just moments ago, now flickered with a hint of brightness.

“And you?” he asked.

“…I’ll watch TV,” Shangguan Yu replied.

“Okay!”

And so, for the first time, Shangguan Yu and Zuo Zhou were in the same room at a time that wasn’t related to meals.

Shangguan Yu lowered the volume of the TV and focused his eyes on the screen.

At first, he wasn’t entirely comfortable with the idea of someone being so close by, so he found it difficult to concentrate on the TV. He also couldn’t ignore the warmth emanating from Zuo Zhou, which made him feel uneasy.

But Zuo Zhou was very considerate. He held his breath and sat quietly, so still that it felt as though he wasn’t even there, effectively lowering his presence to make it easier for Shangguan Yu to focus.

Gradually, Shangguan Yu was drawn into the dramatic and intense storyline on the screen. He became fully immersed in the show, slowly forgetting that there was another person in the room.

They spent over an hour together in peace, and soon it was nearly six o’clock.

“I’ll go make dinner,” Zuo Zhou said, placing the laptop on the coffee table and, somewhat intentionally, turning the screen in Shangguan Yu’s direction. “Brother Yu, how about some eight-treasure porridge and pancakes for dinner? I’ve learned to make a new type of egg pancake, it should be pretty good.”

“Mm.” Shangguan Yu’s attention was entirely on the TV, and he wasn’t particularly picky about food, so he responded without a second thought.

“Alright then,” Zuo Zhou replied, casting a brief, thoughtful glance at Shangguan Yu before quickly looking at his laptop. He then turned and headed to the kitchen.

Five minutes later, the episode ended, and Shangguan Yu paused the TV, intending to go get some water and stretch a bit. However, before he could move, his eyes were drawn to the laptop that Zuo Zhou had left on the coffee table.

Hmm?

With just one glance, Shangguan Yu recognized the set of unfinished architectural blueprints. His trained eye immediately spotted several common mistakes that beginners often make—errors he himself had once committed in the past.

A surge of indescribable emotion suddenly overwhelmed him. Memories of his past work, the busy, fulfilling days before the accident, rushed in like a tidal wave, crashing against the desolate, hollow chambers of his heart.

A long-suppressed impulse suddenly surged up, rapidly growing into an unbreakable wall of desire that urged and provoked Shangguan Yu, momentarily making him forget his pain. It felt as though time had rewound, returning him to the exact moment before all the suffering had begun.

In the kitchen, Zuo Zhou, pretending to be diligently cooking, anxiously stole a glance at the living room and caught sight of Shangguan Yu, his face dark and tense as he stared at the laptop on the coffee table.

Zuo Zhou had intentionally left several obvious mistakes in the architectural drawings, hoping to gauge Shangguan Yu’s reaction.

But now, looking at Shangguan Yu’s expression, Zuo Zhou couldn’t predict what he would say or do once he left the room—or if he would act as if nothing had happened.

He knew he couldn’t rush it, so he took a deep breath and forced himself to continue cooking.

Over half an hour later, dinner was ready. Zuo Zhou walked out of the kitchen, acting as though he knew nothing, and cheerfully “innocently” invited Shangguan Yu to eat.

By now, Shangguan Yu had already turned off the TV and was sitting at the coffee table, scrolling through his phone.

Upon hearing Zuo Zhou’s call, he muttered a quiet “Mm,” placing his phone face down on his lap, glances briefly at the still-open laptop buzzing on the table, and maneuvered his wheelchair toward the dining table.

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