Axolotl Translations

Shangguan Yu barely slept through the night—he lost count of how many times he woke up.

All he knew was that every time he opened his eyes, Zuo Zhou was right there by his bedside. And the moment he stirred, Zuo Zhou would softly ask if he needed warm water, if he was still feeling unwell…

It was as if Zuo Zhou hadn’t slept at all, just to be there for him at a moment’s notice.

Shangguan Yu was groggy, half-conscious, and couldn’t even recall if he had properly told Zuo Zhou to stop staying up and go rest in his own room. But he had to admit—each time he woke up and saw Zuo Zhou sitting there, a deep sense of security settled in his chest.

And somehow, his feverish body didn’t feel quite as miserable.

Zuo Zhou barely closed his eyes all night.

Whenever Shangguan Yu woke up, he was there to help him drink water and take his medication. And when Shangguan Yu drifted back to sleep, he stayed by his side, carefully wiping him down with alcohol to help reduce the fever.

His efforts paid off. After a night of meticulous care, Shangguan Yu’s fever finally broke just before dawn.

Perhaps because his body wasn’t suffering as much anymore, he finally sank into a deep, peaceful sleep. Sweat clung to his dark hair, strands sticking to his forehead, making him look particularly fragile.

After taking his temperature one last time and confirming the fever was gone, Zuo Zhou finally exhaled a long breath of relief.

He relaxed, resting his arms on the bedside, and gently brushed the stray strands of hair from Shangguan Yu’s forehead. Then, with a quiet chuckle, he tapped the tip of his nose and murmured, “So stubborn.”

By the time Shangguan Yu woke up again, daylight had already filled the room.

Shangguan Yu tilted his head slightly, glancing at the sliver of light streaming through the gap in the curtains. His whole body felt sticky, but compared to when he had a fever, he definitely felt much stronger.

His gaze drifted downward and landed on Zuo Zhou, who was asleep by his bedside.

Zuo Zhou’s face was turned toward him, his breathing slow and even. His long, dark lashes rested quietly against his skin, giving him the look of deep, peaceful slumber.

Not wanting to wake him, Shangguan Yu endured his thirst and remained still.

He had no idea how much time passed, but just as his back began to ache from lying in the same position for too long, Zuo Zhou finally stirred.

Rubbing his eyes, the first thing he did was lean in to check on Shangguan Yu. Their eyes met unexpectedly, catching both of them off guard.

“You’re awake!” Zuo Zhou exclaimed, delighted. “How are you feeling? I checked earlier—your fever’s gone.”

“Mm… much better.”

Shangguan Yu had just opened his mouth to say he was a little thirsty when Zuo Zhou preempted him. “Are you thirsty? Hungry? Do you want something to eat?”

“…Yeah, I’d like some water.”

“Got it! I’ll get you some warm water.”

Without another word, Zuo Zhou sprang from his seat and dashed out of the room in a flash.

Shangguan Yu watched him go, taking in his boundless energy—as if he hadn’t stayed up all night at all. He moved so effortlessly, like a nimble little rabbit.

…Ah, youth really is something else.

Under Zuo Zhou’s meticulous care, Shangguan Yu drank some water, washed his face, and changed into fresh, dry clothes while still in bed. Then, bundled up tightly, he was finally allowed to move from the bedroom to the living room.

“Sit here,” Zuo Zhou instructed, guiding Shangguan Yu to a spot on the balcony where he could bask in the sunlight and still see the television. “I’ll bring you anything you want to eat or drink, and then I’ll start cooking.”

“…I don’t really feel like eating.”

“Alright, then I’ll bring you the remote.”

“…Okay.”

After this whole fever incident—brought on by his own stubborn insistence on showering—Shangguan Yu had started following Zuo Zhou’s instructions without protest.

After all, it was his own fault. Yet, not only did Zuo Zhou refrain from scolding him, but he had also stayed up all night, caring for him with unwavering devotion.

If he were in Zuo Zhou’s place… Shangguan Yu wasn’t sure he would have done the same. So, if Zuo Zhou wanted to fuss over him, he might as well just go along with it. Besides… besides, he was probably the closest person to him right now.

Lost in thought, Shangguan Yu snapped back to reality when a black remote control appeared in front of his face.

“What are you thinking about, Brother Yu?” Zuo Zhou asked.

“…Nothing,” Shangguan Yu replied, refusing to admit he had decided to just listen to him from now on.

Zuo Zhou gave him a knowing look, as if he saw right through him, but in the end, he just smiled—innocent and harmless. “Alright, I’m going to make some food now. Since you just recovered from a fever, I’ll keep it light. It might not be super delicious, but you still have to eat, okay? Promise me you’ll be good and eat plenty.”

“…Got it.”

Zuo Zhou looked at Shangguan Yu for a moment, amused by how obedient he was being. Unable to resist, he reached out and gave his cheek a playful pinch before darting off to the kitchen before Shangguan Yu could react.

Left behind, Shangguan Yu sat there, his cheek still tingling slightly: …

By the afternoon, his fever hadn’t returned. Still, Zuo Zhou remained vigilant, insisting that he rest in bed. He warned him that fever relapses were most common in the evening and that they couldn’t let their guard down just yet.

Although Shangguan Yu felt fully recovered and doubted the fever would return, he refrained from arguing—given his previous “transgressions,” he figured it was best to to go along with it. So, without complaint, he followed Zuo Zhou’s instructions and took a nap.

That evening, after dinner, Zuo Zhou wheeled Shangguan Yu around the room as they chatted. Every ten minutes, he would pull out the forehead thermometer and scan his temperature.

By the eighth time, Shangguan Yu finally spoke up. “You don’t need to check so often.”

“Hm?” Zuo Zhou was still focused on the thermometer’s reading. Only after confirming there was no fever did he look at Shangguan Yu. “What did you say?”

“…I said, you don’t need to check so frequently. If my fever returns, I’ll feel it myself. Plus, I’ve been taking my medication all day and being careful—I should be fine.”

“You’re right. Maybe I’m being overly cautious,” Zuo Zhou admitted with a smile, slipping the thermometer into his pocket. “Alright, I’ll check every half hour instead.”

“………………”

Even when Shangguan Yu went to bed at ten that night without any sign of fever, Zuo Zhou still didn’t seem entirely reassured.

“How about I stay in here with you tonight? That way, if you feel unwell, I’ll know immediately.”

“There’s no need. If I feel bad, I’ll call you.”

“But what if your fever gets too high and you’re too delirious to call? Or what if your throat gets so sore you can’t even speak?” Zuo Zhou frowned. “I’d feel much more comfortable staying by your side. Otherwise, even if I go back to my room and lie down, I won’t be able to sleep.”

“……”

“Brother Yu, just let me stay, please?” Zuo Zhou pleaded. “I’ll do what I did last night—sit by your bedside while you sleep. If you wake up, I’ll check your temperature, and if anything seems off, I’ll wipe your palms with alcohol right away. If it gets serious, I’ll wake you to take medication.”

“Please? Will you let me stay?”

“……” Shangguan Yu couldn’t resist Zuo Zhou’s persistence. With no other choice, he relented. “Fine.”

After saying that, he hesitated a moment before adding, “But don’t lean on the bedside again—it’s too uncomfortable. You… you can sleep in the bed.”

By the time he finished his sentence, his voice had softened, and his face had flushed.

Zuo Zhou’s eyes widened in surprise—he could hardly believe what he had just heard.

Shangguan Yu, realizing what he had just said, suddenly felt embarrassed. He turned his head away, lips pressed tightly together, pretending nothing had happened.

After a long silence, Zuo Zhou finally snapped out of his reverie. He took a deep breath and, in a slightly husky voice, replied, “Okay.”

At this moment, Zuo Zhou had so much he wanted to say. But he was afraid that even a single extra word might make Shangguan Yu hesitate, take back his words, or change his mind. So, he chose to remain silent.

After washing up and changing clothes, Zuo Zhou quietly moved to the bedside.

Shangguan Yu was already lying down, his back turned towards him, facing the wall. It was unclear if he had fallen asleep. The small bedside lamp was still on, as if he had left it for Zuo Zhou.

Zuo Zhou stood there in silence for a moment before finally slipping off his slippers and climbing onto the bed. He lay down on the outer side, next to Shangguan Yu.

Shangguan Yu, who was definitely not asleep, immediately felt the mattress dip slightly behind him, followed by the familiar scent of fresh soap as Zuo Zhou settled beside him.

This wasn’t the first time they had shared a bed. But for some reason, Shangguan Yu’s heartbeat was racing—so fast and so loud that it felt deafening in his own ears.

He took a few deep breaths, forcing himself to calm down and drift off to sleep.

But then, from behind him, Zuo Zhou’s soft voice broke the silence.

“Brother Yu, are you asleep? I can’t sleep.”

Shangguan Yu didn’t respond. He remained still, pretending to be sound asleep, hoping Zuo Zhou would take the hint and just go to sleep himself.

But Zuo Zhou was never one to give up easily. Not only did he not quiet down, but he went a step further—shifting closer and tentatively reaching out, wrapping an arm around Shangguan Yu from behind.

Shangguan Yu froze completely. Even his breathing stopped.

“Brother Yu, I know you’re not asleep.”

Zuo Zhou’s voice was soft, as if he didn’t want to shatter the fragile illusion of peace. “I can’t sleep either.”

Silence.

“My mind is full of you… I keep worrying—what if your fever returns? What if you’re still unwell? What if you’re uncomfortable? Brother Yu, do you have any idea how much I worry about you?”

Of course Shangguan Yu knew. He knew it all too well. But he didn’t answer.

Zuo Zhou let out a soft sigh. His arms tightened around Shangguan Yu, pulling him even closer. “Brother Yu, what will it take for you to say yes? I’ve tried everything—I’ve said everything. But you still refuse me. Am I really that bad? So bad that you won’t even give me a chance?”

Silence again.

“Am I worse than that Xu guy? Why is it that he—”

“Enough.”

Shangguan Yu finally spoke, unable to bear hearing Zuo Zhou belittle himself like this, comparing himself to Xu Jun.

“Xiao Zuo, you’re good. You’re better than anyone.”

Zuo Zhou went silent for a moment before mumbling, almost sulking, “I don’t believe you. If you really thought I was good, then why won’t you accept me?”

“I…”

“Stop saying you’re afraid of holding me back or ruining my future—I don’t want to hear it.”

Zuo Zhou tightened his embrace around Shangguan Yu, burying his head in the crook of his neck. He nuzzled against him like a stubborn, affectionate puppy. “I just want to be with you. I just like you. I’m not afraid of anything. Brother Yu, please… just this once, be brave for me.”

Shangguan Yu felt his heart take a direct hit.

All this time, he had weighed his options, observed from the sidelines, and cautiously calculated every possible consequence. But in doing so, he had overlooked one crucial thing—there was someone who had been fighting, bravely and relentlessly, just for him.

He had seen everything Zuo Zhou had done. How could he not be moved? How could he not feel his heart waver? He wasn’t made of stone. He, too, had secretly longed for things he thought were beyond his reach, dared to hope for something more despite his circumstances. But he had been too afraid.

Yet at this moment, something shifted.

He realized he had nothing left to lose. So why not take a chance? Why not be brave, just this once—no, one more time—for Zuo Zhou, for himself?

He didn’t want to leave Zuo Zhou. He wanted to stay by his side forever. His heart, which had long been cold and lifeless, now beat with new life—because of Zuo Zhou, only because of Zuo Zhou.

With clarity washing over him, Shangguan Yu took a deep breath. Slowly, he lifted his hand and clasped Zuo Zhou’s fingers, still wrapped around his waist.

Zuo Zhou’s entire body tensed. He had been bracing himself for another rejection, another heartbreak. But now, warm breath trembled against Shangguan Yu’s neck as Zuo Zhou clung to his hand in return—hesitant, anxious, yet brimming with hope.

He waited.

Waited for Shangguan Yu to finally give his heart the answer it had long been yearning for.

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