“It’s not like that,” Fang Li said.
He brushed Qin Weidong’s hand away and kept his head down as he buttoned up his shirt. “I already made plans with my boss…”
“What plans exactly?”
“Uh…” Fang Li faltered, then quickly tried to bluff his way through. “A customer’s coming in to check out a piano. If I make a sale, I get a nice commission. It’s not just some spare change you can look down on!”
The truth was, during a break one day, he’d played one of his songs at the music shop. The owner happened to hear it and thought it was pretty good. He even told Fang Li to finish the song and said he’d pass it along to a friend at a record label. They were always signing new talent and buying songs. If his got picked, what was it called again…? Royalties—that was it. And a decent chunk of change too.
But more than that, Fang Li couldn’t help but feel proud at the thought that someday, someone might actually sing a song he wrote.
“Fang Li.” Qin Weidong called his name, clearly reaching the end of his patience. “You need to stay in the hospital for the next few days. Did you already forget how you passed out last night? What if something happens again when you’re home alone?”
When he called Fang Li by name like that, it usually meant Fang Li had better start listening.
Fang Li said, “It’s because of your coworker last night! He pissed me off. Who told him to insult you like that?”
“Fang Li, this isn’t a negotiation,” Qin Weidong said, his tone sharp.
But Fang Li wasn’t buying it. He stepped into his shoes and shot back, “You can say my name a hundred times, and I’m still going. Don’t try pulling rank on me—I don’t work for you!”
He grabbed the jacket from the end of the bed and shrugged it on, even pulled a cap over his head. The message was loud and clear: he wasn’t going to listen no matter what Qin Weidong said.
Qin Weidong felt a headache coming on. He still had to meet with HR, Secretary Li was waiting on him, and there was a whole line of things that needed his attention.
“I’m heading out—”
Before Fang Li could finish, he felt his arm yanked back, followed by a sharp sting on his backside—Qin Weidong had just slapped him. It wasn’t hard, but it rang out loud and clear. More warning than punishment.
Fang Li’s eyes widened. He stood frozen for several seconds before it registered—Qin Weidong had actually hit him!
Qin Weidong had only given him the one swat. He couldn’t bring himself to do it again. His expression stayed stern. “Can you just listen for once?”
Fang Li snapped back to his senses, his ears and face flushing red. “Qin Weidong! You spanked me!”
He sprang up in outrage, grabbed the pillow from the hospital bed, and started smacking Qin Weidong with it. “Are you crazy? Have you lost your mind?! How dare you hit me! What, did you grow a lion’s heart overnight, Qin Weidong?!”
Qin Weidong hadn’t seen it coming. Fang Li, like a little leopard, pounced on him. Qin Weidong didn’t dare fight back and let Fang Li hit him as he yelled, flailing at him from the side of the bed all the way to the door.
“It was bad enough you tried to scare me about the serious stuff, and now you’re trying to bully me into staying in the hospital too? You think just because you know I can’t beat you, you get to do whatever you want? What kind of man are you?!”
Cornered and worn down, Qin Weidong didn’t know where to hide. Seeing Fang Li this riled up, he started worrying it might be bad for his heart. He finally gave in, retreating a thousand steps: “Lili, calm down… please, just calm down, okay?”
Fang Li kept swinging for a while longer before tiring himself out. As he paused to catch his breath and glare at Qin Weidong, the latter seized the chance to snatch the pillow away.
“If something really happened to you… it’d kill me.”
When being tough didn’t work, Qin Weidong softened his voice, trying to reason with him. “I’ve been so swamped these past few days, I didn’t have time to take care of you. What happened last night scared me out of my mind.”
Fang Li pursed his lips but stayed quiet. Seeing that, Qin Weidong gently picked him up and kissed the corner of his lips. “Be good. Just stay here for a few days, for my peace of mind. Please?”
Fang Li wasn’t scared of Qin Weidong yelling or losing his temper—but what he couldn’t handle was when he lowered his voice and spoke to him like this.
Qin Weidong had grown up in the mines, and deep down, he carried that rough-edged, old-school masculinity. Even with Fang Li, he rarely backed down.
Fang Li pouted. “I’m not even having surgery. What’s the point of staying here alone in the hospital…”
He’d been in and out of the hospital for checkups so many times—he didn’t know the reason, but he knew one thing: he wasn’t ready for surgery yet.
Qin Weidong thought for a moment. “How about you stay for a few days, and I’ll buy you some cassette tapes?”
Fang Li’s ears perked up. “Cassette tapes?”
Seeing his reaction, Qin Weidong chuckled. “Yeah, I’ll get you that one… what’s it called…”
Fang Li prompted him, “Zhang Jiayan’s new album, Kiss in Winter!”
“Right. I’ll get that one.”
“Really?” Fang Li quickly masked his excitement, gave a little cough, and said, “But he’s a huge star from Hong Kong and Taiwan. Our local record stores don’t even carry his new album. Can you actually get it?”
Qin Weidong said, “I’ll ask around. Should be possible.”
When Qin Weidong said “should be,” it was usually a sure thing. Fang Li smiled, pushed his lips against Qin Weidong’s, and blinked playfully. “Then I also want Wu Huiling’s album. Can you check for that too?”
Qin Weidong saw right through his little scheme. “Haven’t you already bought enough tapes at home?”
He’d never paid much attention before, and he never counted the money he gave Fang Li. But now that they were moving, he realized Fang Li had somehow managed to collect two full drawers of tapes, with album covers featuring all kinds of stars, even international ones.
“That’s different…” Fang Li wrapped his arms around Qin Weidong’s neck and rocked him gently, putting on a voice so sweet it gave even himself goosebumps. “Buy it for me, please? You literally stepped on my head and smacked me just now, and I didn’t even get mad! If you buy it for me, I’ll stay in the hospital these next few days like a good boy. I won’t fuss or complain…”
“You heartless little brat…” Qin Weidong cursed at him.
Fang Li was overjoyed. Qin Weidong had never really supported his passion for music, so getting him to agree to buy an album he liked but couldn’t find was worth taking a slap for!
Beaming, Fang Li kissed Qin Weidong on the cheek. “Then I’ll just be your little brat. You love your little brat the most! If you buy me a bunch more, I’ll even let you hit me again…”
“What the hell are they teaching you at that music store…”
Fang Li giggled. He was being ridiculous, but Qin Weidong couldn’t do anything about it. Might as well just buy them.
Seeing Fang Li so happy, so full of life, even the cloud of fear from watching him pass out pale-faced last night lifted a bit from Qin Weidong’s heart.
“Be good while you’re in the hospital.”
“Don’t worry! And don’t forget to ask about the tapes!”
Seeing the tension finally ease from Qin Weidong’s face after all night and morning, Fang Li waved at him from the bed. Only after Qin Weidong walked out and shut the door did Fang Li roll over. The smile that had lingered at the corners of his lips slowly faded.
No one knew his body better than he did. It was like a massive machine running inside him, and he could feel exactly which part of it was breaking down.
Especially when it came to something as vital as the heart, no one understood it better than Fang Li himself. With every beat and each contraction of blood, it transmitted feedback through his whole body—he could feel it constantly.
Whether it was serious or not, Fang Li more or less already knew in his heart.
Feeling a bit agitated, he fished his phone out from under his pillow and messaged the music shop owner to ask for leave. He could see how worried and stressed Qin Weidong was, and though there wasn’t much he could do, at the very least he could listen and cooperate—give Qin Weidong a little peace of mind.
It was the off-season, and business at the shop was slow, so the owner approved his time off and asked if Fang Li had finished writing his song.
Fang Li replied: [It’s done, but I’m not home right now—the sheet music is back at the house.]
The owner messaged again: [A friend of mine is coming by in the next couple of days with a new band he just signed. I told them you write songs. If you’re free, bring the sheet music by tomorrow and let them have a listen.]
Fang Li thought about it and replied: [Okay, thanks, boss.]
It was after ten at night when Qin Weidong finally came back. Lately, he always returned late, and Fang Li had gotten used to it.
As soon as he walked in, Qin Weidong asked if Fang Li had felt unwell during the day. Fang Li, who had borrowed some paper and a pen from the nurse’s station, was propped up in bed casually writing sheet music.
“Nope, didn’t feel anything. I honestly think it’s not even my heart—it’s just your coworker. I’m allergic to idiots, that’s why I passed out…”
Qin Weidong asked, “Did you wash your face and brush your teeth?”
“Nope,” Fang Li said without looking up. “I was waiting for you. Won’t you kiss me later?”
Qin Weidong clicked his tongue and shot him a rare glare. “You’re in a hospital. Don’t start anything.”
Fang Li grinned, clearly enjoying himself. “Well, you’re the one who insisted I stay here. It’s not nearly as comfortable as home, is it? Oh, right—how’s the transfer paperwork going?”
“Still need to prepare a bunch of documents.”
Kunshan Group wasn’t like one of the smaller subsidiaries like Chaojiang. It was a proper, old-school state-owned enterprise. Transferring someone meant going through multiple steps—file checks, interviews, public notices. It wouldn’t happen quickly.
“And the album?”
“It has to go through customs. It’ll probably take at least half a month to get here.”
“You really managed to buy it?” The two singers he was talking about were hugely popular in Hong Kong—anytime they released an album, hordes of passionate fans would scramble to get a copy. Fang Li was worried Qin Weidong wouldn’t be able to snag one.
“I had someone pay extra for it. That’s how I got it.” Qin Weidong hadn’t expected that a simple album could be so hard to buy—even money didn’t guarantee success. On his way back, he had picked up some apples from the fruit shop downstairs and now sat peeling one for Fang Li. “Are their songs really that good?”
“Of course! They’re Hong Kong’s top stars—tons of people love them!”
Fang Li added, “The music shop owner said those celebrities all have whole teams behind them. I wrote a song too—do you want to hear it?”
Qin Weidong fed him a slice of apple. “There’s no piano here. How am I supposed to listen to it?”
“No problem! Just come sit here—I’ll hum it for you. You can give me some feedback.”
Fang Li tugged Qin Weidong over to the edge of the hospital bed. He lay down with his head on Qin Weidong’s lap, holding the sheet music he’d written and softly humming the melody.
He always said his biggest disadvantage was his lack of education—he couldn’t write lyrics. Otherwise, it would’ve already been a complete song.
Qin Weidong gently stroked his hair. When Fang Li finished humming, he looked up eagerly. “Well? What do you think?”
Qin Weidong said, “It’s beautiful.”
Fang Li pressed further, “What part sounds good?”
“All of it. Anything you sing sounds good.”
“Pfft, brushing me off again… Fine, fine—you don’t have much musical sense anyway. I won’t push you.” His lips curled up with a pair of charming dimples, full of pride. “In this house, I’m the only one with music genes!”
Qin Weidong loved hearing Fang Li call it “our house.” He lowered his head and kissed Fang Li on the forehead. “You’re the only one, for sure. Go to sleep now. I’ll take advantage of the quiet tonight to study a bit—I’ve got an exam in a few months.”
“An exam?”
Fang Li glanced at the books in Qin Weidong’s hands—they turned out to be self-study materials for math, physics, and chemistry. Qin Weidong explained, “Once I’m transferred to Kunshan, even the youngest staff there will have at least a college degree. Without credentials, no matter how much you do, you’ll always be stuck working under someone else. You’ll never move up. If I pass the exam this year and get into the part-time undergraduate program, I’ll have more opportunities.”
“I see…” Fang Li nodded in understanding.
Qin Weidong picked up his book. “I’ll go read outside. You get some sleep.”
“Just read here,” Fang Li said, shifting his legs to make room. “There are so many people smoking in the hallway—it smells awful. Stay here and read. I can cover my eyes with some clothes, the light won’t bother me. And besides, we’re in a hospital… I can’t sleep well without you by my side.”
Qin Weidong had no choice but to do as he asked. He turned off the light on the other side of the room. Fang Li lay there for a while, but sleep didn’t come.
He sat up and looked at the book Qin Weidong was reading. It had been a long time since he’d left high school, and math, physics, and chemistry had always been his weakest subjects. Even back in school, he couldn’t solve these problems on his own—he needed Qin Weidong to explain everything to him.
“Is it really that hard to get into an undergraduate program?” he asked.
He remembered how, back in their county, very few people actually made it into college. Even getting into a technical secondary school was rare.
“It’s not too bad. I studied it with you before, remember?”
That was true… Most of Fang Li’s high school homework—aside from the essays—had basically been done by Qin Weidong. He’d taught himself from Fang Li’s textbooks and completed the assignments for him.
Back then, Fang Li had thought they could always go on like that.
“Qin Weidong… I feel like I just can’t keep up with you anymore…”
Fang Li wasn’t saying that out of nowhere. The two of them had left Chongsi together, but somehow Qin Weidong had grown up so much faster. His pace was something Fang Li could never match.
In the beginning, Qin Weidong had been confused too, but only briefly. He quickly figured out what he wanted, what he needed to do—and then started planning, calculating, squeezing every second he could to achieve it.
Unlike him. Fang Li never stuck with anything for long. Teaching, night school, singing at the nightclub, dropping out… It felt like he never really followed through on anything.
Qin Weidong put down his pen, pinched Fang Li’s cheek, and frowned. “Didn’t you spend the whole day in the hospital? No one even talked to you, and you’re still overthinking?”
“That’s not it…!” Fang Li was cut off mid-thought. “To you, it’s like everyone out there is a bad influence on me or something…”
And to Qin Weidong, that was exactly how it felt. They’d come out into this bigger, flashier world—money, power, and status were things that a man like Qin Weidong was instinctively driven to pursue.
But when it came to Fang Li, he didn’t want him getting too involved. At least back in Chongsi, Fang Li never had to worry about things like this.
“We’re not going to break up,” Qin Weidong said.
“Really?”
“Really.”
Fang Li wasn’t someone who could hold too much in his head at once—Qin Weidong was right about that. One second he’d be full of complicated feelings, and the next, Qin Weidong’s reassurance would make it all disappear. Feeling a bit drowsy, he leaned over and gave Qin Weidong a kiss. “You’re so smart. You’ll definitely make it.”
Qin Weidong kissed him back and told him to get some sleep.
Axolotl Translations 
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